Monday, December 8, 2008
What is so big deal of having a gf or bf?
To cure loneliness or just for entertainment? Have how many people really loved their bf /gf? Or just some sort of puppy love? Someone can say can’t live without he/she, and then he/she is the one wanna break up. After break up, then becomes nothing, dun even wanna mention of each other and never contact each other… each other continue with their own life, pretend dun know each other… What is the meaning of love then?
When my friends beside me, one by one have become couples, I will feel… dunno how to describe, loneliness, sadness or maybe jealous…
My friend even joked by saying wanna built a ‘gu po yun’ for me. Some asking me why dun wanna go find a bf… they said until I dun wanna have a bf, they dunno that how much I hoped to have someone to be there for me when I say or alone, someone to buy me meals, someone to rely on when tired, someone to care of me, to protect me when I am in trouble, accompany me when I alone, bring me go shopping… I was always waiting for that suitable guy to appear… Am I very greedy?
Even some dun believe that I din couple before, and asked why… How am I gonna explain o? Funny question. Sad experiences I had been through, always the person I like dun like me… what can I do? Accept those I have no feeling toward him? I can’t do it. Dun set my target too high, you think love, this thing can be controlled…
I had once let go the opportunity, which I can only blame myself. But only because I rejected him only I realised how good was him, that I slowly also fall in love with him that I dun realise before this… But it was too late…
When people tried to get near me, there will have lotz of worries and thinking come to my mind… Maybe because of the terrible experience before this… See from outside, I can mix with guys freely, but once reach a limit, there it is, can’t be any closer… Haha, I also can’t help with that.
My pet brother, we had once always sms with each other, but suddenly he like disappear. Always said he was busy of his studies, I was still so stupid to believe him, but the true answer was he had gf already. He Had GF already! And he told me is time for me to find one… Have gf then can neglect her sister? Maybe for him I was just a pet sister… cruel him!
Have gf/bf already then friends and family become nothing… why? They said no time for others… Damm sad, knowing each other for so long then can suddenly replaced by a gf/bf…
I also anticipate for HIM to appear. But who can tell me when is he gonna appear, when is he gonna then? My friend will console me by saying is just not the time yet, a good one worth waiting… wait patiently till the time to come… lol.. Sad…
I dunno why I so worry and nervous of it. I had been single for all this years, I am used to this kinda life, and always place my study in the first place. But why change?
♥ the world will turn WILD.
5:09 PM
