What wrong with changing name, name is just a way of calling someone, a term that you need to respect! From Joycelyn changed to Sherley wasn’t that I change without a reason but still it can become the topic of theirs… I just dun understand they like just wanna spread it and let everyone knows it, just like I had did something and waiting the police come to get me into the jail.
Why did I change? The person told me that the name- joyce will cause me very busy but ended up I wun get any reward for it, and with that name I’ll always under someone and wun be able to become a leader nor success… but with the name given Sherley, I’ll have someone there to help me when I need and able to fulfill my dream and everything shall be going through according to my will… maybe ur not believe of it, but I do so please gimme some respect and privacy and stop announcing “ Do you know that Joyce is no longer Joyce, she had changed to….”
Nothing will remain so I’ll take this as my new life, what is passed let it be a past. From now on I’m Sherley and please do call me that!
♥ the world will turn WILD.
2:00 PM
Thursday, August 20, 2009
High school life was the best, matric life was the best, etc… but we never heard of people saying my life now is the best. Past was past and future is unpredictable! What we really have is NOW! We should appreciate us still able to breath, eat what we like and able to sleep soundly, compared to others we are really far too good that we have everything except being contented. No matter how high you jump, how good you score in the exam or how fast you run; you only found happiness at that moment, human being often think of what they dun have but never satisfied with what you already had. How high you fly, you still will feel tired and home is where the place you can rest and settle down. Contention is the wealth inside us that contribute to the happiness.
Able to study medic is it that important anymore, the viruses are spreading widely all over the world, and the amount of people die due to H1N1 had reached 1713 people and the figure still rising everyday. How many of the patients can really a doctor saved? Doctors aren’t that perfect, they can just help but now saving you from the hand of death god. Maybe I should be grateful getting into the best university in Malaysia, still having the chance to study while people outside there fighting with the disease and hoping for another chance to see tomorrow sunshine.
And yet the natural disasters are happening everywhere, izit really a natural disaster or human’s works? The flow of water was out of control of the earth’s gravitation full, is became unbalance that can be seen through the flood at china and forest’s fire at Australia. How could this be happening? There was once my friend told me about that the calendars of India only until year 2012, 21th of December (21-12-2012) dunno izit just coincident or there is something behind it. While my friend told me symbolized the end of the world, izit true I dunno, and I wasn’t believe at him that time, but now what happening around us making me start to believe as we continue destroying the earth, we’ll get the consequences and it only will took two more years to show us the result. The earth is now giving us forewarning whether the human wanna learn from the mistake or not it depends.
Typhoon at Taiwan, flood at China, while other place having dry season. All happened at the same day, leaf through the newspaper was all about the disasters and the diseases. In the other hand, the Afghan is having war among their people due to the politic voting. When will human start to aware of what that did is wrong and stop those stupid action.
Why are there H1N1 and SARS viruses? If human dun eat meat, dun be greed of eating those wild birds, the viruses wun be able to enter our body and transform to another kind which will harm our life. All was human’s act that as the result harming themselves. Cancer was another result of selfishness and greediness of human being. The invention of chemicals and genetic modified food to the crop and food, in order to get a better yield and crops free from pesticides, without thinking the harm that will bring to the human’s health. As these chemical and GMF enter our body, it effect the brain controlling system and hence it change the genetic information in the cell which cause repetition and the formation of the cancerous cells. Who to blame when problems appeared? How will the problems gonna stop? Only when the earth doesn’t have any existence of human being... Sad to say the most intelligent human who inventing those high technologies try to save people and improving their qualities of life but in other hand they are slowly destroying themselves.
19 August 2009 3:18 pm
♥ the world will turn WILD.
6:18 AM
Saturday, August 15, 2009
Finally I manage to donate blood. I missed so many times of the chances to donate blood, till though it was a curse haha. First time was during matric, that time I was still under age and that day I had bought ticket to go home, missed! Second time was the worst, I had mentally and physically prepared for the blood donation, ate healthier food and vitamin and sleep earlier that night but ended up I had period on that morning, I really wanna cry out, only can see other people donate although I passed all the test (weight, heamoglobin count and blood pressure), my mum told me that maybe was I not suitable to donate blood so my just passed away grandma protecting me… The third time was Wesak day, but suddenly we found out that my grandma had a fall and entered hospital, no choice we rush back and missed again! Fourth time was my college’s de, so coincidently I having period too… Few day after that, at the uni also having blood donation campaign, when I went there, it closed!
For the sixth time, and finally I make it, after all the obstacles, I manage to donate my blood haha so happy. I went there with lee wei and bee bee. After all the test I passed but they have low blood pressure so the nurses over there advice us to have our lunch first. Ended up I ate too full and cant donate blood scare I’ll vomit, so I walk around and take picture for them and be the last one to donate. In the process, the nurse tied my hand too hard till, my hand no energy to pump and turn white due to no blood flow into my hand …after the adjustment, for the first time I can feel the blood flowing out from my body. So happy can help the others and had the feeling of success. lol Why would I want to donate blood so much? It is just same as the reason wanna help those who need and maybe due to my grandma was a dialysis patient, always need for blood transfusion. Manage to help others who really in need are always the happiest thing, hope that the patient after receiving my blood can get well soon. This is another way for me to help “my” patient without need to being a doctor.
14 Aug 09
♥ the world will turn WILD.
1:23 PM
Friday, August 14, 2009
Changing course
I got the scholarship of IPTA, sponsor me for all the tuition fee and expenditure for food of rm700, until master and PhD at oversea if I have a good result but bonded with the government to be a lecturer for 6 years. It was a very good offer and I have no worries of money and job finding in the future just I wasn’t my cup of tea! I asked my friends’ opinion, all said interest come first in your concerning. As you know, studying chemistry wasn’t my first choice, and all the problems seemed to pop out…
I was so innocent thinking that I shall have a easier life by choosing chem, no need to study so hard and can enjoy life by taking this course and in the future, I can high opportunity to find a job and get high salary. Compared to medicine, I can graduate faster and may have the title of Dr too… I was wrong, studying what you not interested is suffering! Although among so many subject, chem was best score but no matter how hard I putting my afford in liking it, I just can control my mind.
I used to focus too much on medic, planning all my life related to medic, but the final exam in matric was when the nightmare started, if I could focus and study well that time, the history might had changed, I wun be so headache persuading myself to accept the fact. Even now I wanna change course I also dunno what courses I can change to… engineering, I din study physic in matric, it will be difficult for me without a strong base. Architect, no physic base and creativity; pharmacy and dentistry, not interested; linguistic, poor and terrible in languages… what else can I change to? Ended up only can change from pure chem to applied chem, so sad case!
Without interest, you’ll find it so hard to proceed and find hundreds of disadvantages of it but not a single advantage. No matter how easy the subject is, it will become something that is so hard and unable to do… I realize that interest is the one controlling your mind, your action and your passion toward stuff, but is too late to make a u-turn. Was it a right choice I took this step? Should I continue? Whenever there is someone talked bad about it, as usual reaction, I will protest but now I’ll follow and accept what they said was true, having no point to argue with them because deep inside myself also agree with it… Tiring telling myself dun regret and that was my fate which was best for me. Chem and medic was such a big different subject. I thought I had mentally and physically for the change and prepared to accept the challenge, as the result I was not! I can’t accept being very normal and casual, when you tell others about your course, their reaction were “OIC” not “wow” or surprising… I hate their reactions, hate myself unable to get good result to study what I want. Although chemist also consider as a scientist but seemed its level was lower compared to medic and engineering, like those not smart or people who get eliminated who studying it. In my course, mostly is stpm students, some of them will think that you are not smart enough to get the course you want. It was true that chemistry wasn’t our first choice.
I shouldn’t listen to my dad, aiming for UM in order for the convenience of transport. If I know the result was like this, I rather apply for USM or go Sabah or Sarawak to study medic or choosing dietitian and nutrition then I would have less regret… although is so hard to score but it is so fun studying it, even now I felt so sad unable to further my study in bio. Everything is too late, my friend advice seemed to be true, reaching for the dream is always the most important, money is just secondary. I really hope I have time machine now to undo back all the mistake steps!
♥ the world will turn WILD.
1:29 PM
Saturday, August 8, 2009
Uni life!
I had been selected for basketball training, sounded nothing special, but this was my first time my talent being noticed. I was trained by my dad since small during primary school, due to badminton was so common, and everyone knows how to play so it was really nothing special about knowing how to play. But I wasn’t trained for the strategy, which was my weakness that can’t enter competition. Now is my turning point haha…
University life was so so different, the cruel of the reality had slowly shown to us by asking us to aware of the life of society in the world. Independent, always be aware of people beside you and alert to the environment…in another word, being sensitive and you as a single individual, not one can help you and others are all your competitor, BEWARE!!!
Uni life is also kinda boring and dull… everyday wake up in the early morning to make sure dun missed the bus (often not punctual) and dun late to class, then listen to the lecturers (even though boring also need to make yourself stay awake and ‘pretend’ pay attention), class till 5 or 6 was so tiring and night time still have practices or not then yamcha… oh, end of one day and repeated the same every day. Really like lack of meaning of continuing the life… swt… although it was very pack and busy, joined lots of activities (which only making yourself suffer more due to time crushing and not enough time), and passed very fast (which is my 6th week here) but I dun find any things that can make me unforgettable or special of… maybe just more freedom and friendship (they are really crazy and cute haha)…
Hatta set a motto for myself in order for a more meaningful and successful uni life!
♥ the world will turn WILD.
12:50 PM
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
I love shopping, which girls don’t… But dislike window shopping… go to the shopping mall and enjoy buying stuffs as long as affordable, I’ll save money in order to spend happily during that time. No one can stop me when started to addict on buying stuff nonstop… and eating the secret recipe cake or baskin robin ice-cream is the best part of life. I dun mind how much I spend or regret of buying that stuff, not to say I am rich, just looking at the account book’s figures wun make you feel happy… you can say that I am materialistic or dun have a financial planning, for me what is more important is happy and dun regret of it…
As today, I went to withdrawal 300 bucks from atm and bought 3 references books one go… I like to read just like I like to go to Popular and library even thought without any purpose, looking at those books also can felt very satisfying. Then, carrying those heavy books went to Rumah University to eat fish and chip with friends, feeling so happy trying on something new… later, after eating became so lazy to walk back to the bus station and that time was so hot, then we decided to take a cab back. At first I tot was 3 bucks back to hostel, then only found out that once u sit on the taxi, it will charge 3 bucks then see how long is ur journey and go by meter… ended, around 7 minutes car journey (20 minutes walking distance) took us 5.20… that was so expensive! I always got con by the taxi driver, last time went to pasar malam, people paid for rm5.50 but we paid 10 bucks due to the reason of after 10pm the fee is double swt.. and another experience was from my house to pyramid it was such a short distance it also cost me 7 bucks… sobx not the first time maybe they think I am innocent nice to cheat?
♥ the world will turn WILD.
5:48 AM
Monday, August 3, 2009
Interview session
This scholarship wasn’t my cup of tea, I was thinking of changing to applied chemistry instead of pure chem, due to higher paid and better prospective in the future. This scholarship has the good of it will sponsor all my education fee and giving me 700bucks every month for my personal expenditure and send me to overseas to further my master, but there is a bond later on I hatta work with the government to do research. Government scholarship always will wanna tie us and work with them.
This wasn’t the problem, this morning when I went to the interview, I was told by the interviewer that this was for future lecturer. It was so unfair that government always provide a lot of scholarship to those teachers and lecturers…
I was the first candidate and I had no idea and no experience how a formal interview will it be, my previous experience was just interview for the posts of club. The first part was the group interview, 8 of us from um, all Malay and I was the only Chinese, I can’t really participated in the group discussion because of my poor Malay speaking.
First of all was introducing ourselves, I cant manage to finish my intro due to I kept stopping to think of the Malay words and might be too nervous. Then we were given the current issue about the PBSMi, should the government change the science and math subjects to be taught in Malay? And how is the Malay language gonna sustain without using it. Secondly what is the ways that the intake of university students increases the ratio of country side students? I suggested using 50% academic and 50% skills in Malaysia examination system. And inside the room was freaking cold, gonna freeze inside. The aircon was just behind me, the cold air blew into my backbone I was shivering inside the room. In the end I took a hot tea and hold it in my hand but still shivering nonstop.
Second session was individual which took about 10 to 15 minutes, I was praying they can let me out quickly. They asked me about the scop of lecturers involved… totally blank and dunno how to answer. 2) What is the quality should have in a chemist 3) What if you are offered for this scholarship, will you choose your studies or husband? 4) How are you gonna maintain your result in order to continue getting this scholarship. If you din get good result, you will hatta pay back, are you willing to take the risk? 5) What are the qualities in you?
After my interview session, not a relief came into my mind but headache and sleepy. Hope to get back asap but hatta wait for everyone to finish the interview session. Waiting doing nothing was damm tiring, wanna sleep but cant sleep. My heachache became more and more serious. At 12 when everyone had done, but the bus driver said wait together with the afternoon session to complete only go back together mean hatta wait till 6. No way, I wanna go back to do my homework and report. Then I followed a Malay girl back, but waited for 1 hour plus only her brother came, and go around the kl for another 1 hour, finally I had my lunch at 3 something and got back to hostel at 4. It was really tiring of waiting time to pass. Ended up I found out that basketball practice was on sun night not sat night.
If I would know earlier, I’ll ask my dad to fetch me back at 10 in the morning. An experience of an interview spent so many of my precious times. Besides that, I fall sick result of too tired. Omg, it was really a ‘special’ experience! 25 July 09
♥ the world will turn WILD.
3:55 PM
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